Beautiful Horror of last Sept '05

I've been forwarding this to myself since Sept. '05, so I thought it about time to post it. From New Orleans news reports:





Fire in New Orleans from oil/gas storage warehouse.  This picture could be called beautiful, except for the horrible suffering there.   Fire and water are said to be the most destructive "re-birthing" elements... hopefully those folks can have their lives "re-birthed" too, and soon. 



Unfortunately, my hope that folks would find re-birth has not materialized much, if at all.  Few have been allowed to go home... few can afford to clean up their land or rebuild...

 

Imagine..... if Ocean City, NJ just........ or Florida just......disappeared under the ocean..........  Imagine if an entire California city just disappeared.......   Wouldn't the USA want to re-build? 

 

Maybe a private company will step up and ask to buy New Orleans.......... 

Life moves along ...still

        The one thing about life is it continues right along despite what is going on....

 

         My daaughter is out of ICU and back home.  Thank goodness!  I just hope she listens to the Dr and to my suggestions (I have had the same medical problem, so I've been through it).

 

         In the meantime..... since the beginning of August, I have worked on webpages.... and today, my first page went through the "validator" (checks your coding) and it only has TWO errors -- ones Frontpage stuck in there.

 

         So, congrats to ME.  Yay.  Now I just need to start uploading and check links etc....

 

Whew!

Life Kicks (& not just in the womb)

           Ever notice how much life gets in the way of living?  From around shadowy corners, out of the old "left field," life happens TO us, giving us a swift kick backwards.

 

             The kicks can come from two very different directions - from other people - and from our own bodies.  I don't know which I feel betrayed by more.

 

               I had decided to seek some help  from a person for some particular things.... and she had agreed to help.  Said then that her "intuition" said she should help me... that she felt a calling to assist me...  All was well, until she decided to give me a swift kick.....  And her reason?  Her "intuition" !  (Gee, guess her intuition cannot make up its mind!)    Loyalty doesn't always get respected by some; she didn't appreciate mine obviously.  And worse about the "kick," often the reasons people give for kicking you have more to do about THEM than about YOU.  Ever notice that?  Their faults, mistakes & shortcomings suddenly get blamed on you.  I don't think most people are even aware of this when they do it.  My opinion:  When you are going to KICK ME, at least be HONEST with yourself, and me!  Don't blame your reasons on the other person, or use a lame excuse like "intuition" (which you said expressed a completely contradictory message NOW than the message earlier).

 

        The other KICKS come when disease, illness, or accident "gets ya," and without saying, this kind is worse if you've already been kicked in the past by your body revolting against life -- and against you.  This time, the kick was indirect.  Illness has re-found my daughter, who has been in ICU since last week.  She almost  

                           died ....................................................   

How............  how......... how does a parent handle that?????  

I want to spare her this major life kick ---- but -----

                                                                            I can't.

 

How pathetic.  How useless I feel.  

 

Kick ME, Life, don't kick my kid.  

 

          

Two Weeks aready?

Wow two weeks goes by in an eyeblink it seems.

I've been very, very, very busy.  And it's been a great time!  After struggling with webpages, I've managed to put together over 45 pages (well they are each over 90% done).  Just some finishing touches and I'll be ready to launch.  Ooops! "Launch" -- what is that?  HOW do I do that??  Well, that will be one of my upcoming lessons.

I want to thank Janet, cousin to my friend Vicki.  Without Janet, I would still be stuck on this project, which had not gotten even 1 page done that I liked even a little.  But, with Janet's help, I've learned a TON of stuff and am well on my way!

Of course, now I have to go delete 2 previous attempts at *very* bad websites!  I'll be glad to see those few pages go!  And of course, I can use that space for my new & improved pages!  Yeah!

I really get a kick from mastering NEW info and finding success in USING new info.  I guess I'm very much a "learner;" that is, I really enjoy learning.  I never, ever, ever thought I'd be doing this kind of project!

Of course, I have jitters about launching the website.  Will it be good enough for users?  Will they like it?  Have I forgotten anything?  At night, I can "hear" ideas perculating in my mind.  Sooner or later those ideas will pop to the surface.  I hope soon, cos I'm not happy with the color & images "design" part of my webpages yet.  Part of MY problem is that what I like in images doesn't lend itself very well to computer use.  Nor on mainly data pages (genealogy data).  So I'm searching free image sites to see what I can find.

Hopefully, I'll have my very first website up & running by November.   I'm planning three sites linked together.  Hope it works.

Of course.... the work on my book has come to a standstill - again.  I really think I should have a secretary (or two)-- LOL.  I don't have enough hands to do what I want to get done!!

 

Justice for Patients left to drown/die

           On September 7th I wrote in this journal that the nursing home owners needed to be identified, charged, and jailed for suspected homocide or manslaughter for leaving those patients/not evacuating the patients.  I also wrote a letter to CNN about WHY no journalist had attempted to identify/find/interview the persons responsible for those patients being abandoned.

             Well, some action has been taken, finally.  Read below.

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"Nursing Home Owners Charged in Deaths

BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) - The husband-and-wife owners of a nursing home near New Orleans were charged Tuesday with negligent homicide in the deaths of 34 people during the flooding unleashed by Hurricane Katrina.

The case represents the first major prosecution to come out of the disaster.

The owners of St. Rita's Nursing Home in Chalmette "were asked if they wanted to move (the patients). They did not. They were warned repeatedly that this storm was coming," Louisiana Attorney General Charles Foti said.

"In effect, their inaction resulted in the deaths of these patients," Foti said.

Salvador A. Mangano and his wife, Mable, surrendered and were jailed on 34 counts of negligent homicide. Each count carries up to five years in prison.

The attorney general said he is also investigating the discovery of more than 40 corpses at flooded-out Memorial Medical Center, in New Orleans' Uptown section.

The victims at St. Rita's died Aug. 29, the day the hurricane hit, and on Sept. 6, at least 14 unrecognizable bodies were still inside the nursing home, the New York Times reported last week.

St. Bernard Parish Councilman Ricky Melerine said the water rose 3 feet in 15 minutes that morning and then even faster, the Times said.

Several men tried to rescue the nursing home's residents by floating them out on mattresses, and others were able to walk to a school, the Times said. In all, the home had about 60 residents.

There were apparent efforts to fight the incoming water inside St. Rita's. A table was nailed against a window and a couch was pushed up against a door, the Times said. There was also evidence that water had reached the roof.

The owners had an evacuation plan as required under state law and a contract with an ambulance service to evacuate the patients, but they did not call the company, Foti said.

They also turned down an offer from St. Bernard Parish officials who asked if the nursing home wanted help evacuating, he said. The home is about 10 miles southeast of New Orleans in an area of heavy devastation.

Foti said the bodies have not all been identified and he was not sure how many of the victims were patients or staff.

"They had a duty and a standard of care to people who could not care for themselves," Foti said of the owners. "If you or I decided we are going to stay, we do it of our own free will.

The people at the nursing home don't have that choice."

09/13/05 17:54 EDT

Copyright 2005 The Associated Press.

My experience is not your expectation

I've been saving this quoatation in an email since June 21st and forwarding it to myself month after month (AOL takes mail that is more than 30 days old).  The quote is: "My experience is not your expectation."  Regretfully, I don't remember where I saw it.

                              My experience is not your expectation....

            My life drastically changed in 1999.  After almost 20 years of "walking-wounded" type pain, my body finally gave in (gave up) and the past 7 years has been practically unbearable with 24 hr. severe pain.  My mobility changed; my life changed.

           But, my family has not understood the changes I've gone through, nor the situation I now find myself in every day.  They expect my life to be the same.  But, it is not the same, and probably will never be the same ever again. 

          Yet, my sisters still expect me to be normal, and to have normal activities as they do in their lives.  They don't want to hear that I'm in pain; they don't want to hear one word about (ewww) illness.  They have not been chronically ill.  They expect me to recover as one would after a bad cold or flu.  But, chronic pain is not like that; recovery, if any occurs, might happen after surgical intervention, or, maybe never.  Never is a word they don't want to hear.

          No, if I try to come to terms with my situation and begin accepting what has happened TO me, my sisters say I am not being "positive enough."  They fully believe positive thinking is enough to make my pain just disappear.  They ignore the fact that medical interventions (physical therapy, ultrasound, etc.) has failed to correct the problem and that if surgery is not recommended (or indicated) that the way I am now will be the way I will be.  No amount of positive thinking will totally heal my body or make damaged nerves suddenly functional again.

         For 7 years I have tried to beas productive as I can be from the confines of bed or chair, mostly bed.  Somedays, I make tremendous progress towards goals I have set for different projects, but other days, progress is very little.  My family doesn't understand that how I wake up is never predictable.  A "good day" is never guaranteed.  For me, a "positive" in my day may be that I completed 2 pages of writing a book.  Just 2 little pages.  No, it doesn't compare to my former life of bread-winner, mother, errand-runner, going back to college for a 2nd degree.  But those days are gone.  Now a "positive" may be that I had one or two "good hours" before pain overruled any plans I had for the day.

         Pain has not only taken away my former "normal" life, sadly it has also taken away my relationships with 2 of my 3 remaining sisters.  I can't talk to them and under the circumstances, they don't want to talk to me.  They've become judgmental and unaccepting of -- me.  We have no contact now except an occasional email.  One of the two never emails at all.  There are no telephone calls.

         I am sad that they don't want me in their lives.  Yet, I cannot be treated as though I should be apologetic for what life has handed to me to bear.  I cannot be treated as though I am some burden to them (they live in other States, are not close-by, and are never responsible for my care, so the feeling of being a burden comes only from how they speak and act towards me). 

         No, "my experience is not your expectation...."  I cannot run to the mall with my sisters, or jump in the car to go to a restaurant for lunch/dunner with them.  I cannot go "see the sites" if / when they choose to visit me.  I can no longer get in my car to make the 12+ hour trip to see the one...or take an airplane across the country to see the other one.  I no longer have a job/work to tell them about, or to relate funny stories about my boss/coworkers.  I cannot even personally relate to things they experience out in the world now, like driving in traffic jams and the high cost of gas.  My world is no longer out in "the world."  My world is now this world, a much smaller world than I ever, ever, thought or dreamed or ever knew existed.  I never thought this would be my world at a young age.

          No, dear sisters, "my experience is not your expectation...."   And my expectation and hope is no one will ever have to go through this experience....

 

 

God Help Us All

"The enormity of the disaster came ever-clearer in neighboring St. Bernard Parish, which was hit by a levee break that brought a wall of water up to 20 feet high. State Rep. Nita Hutter said 30 people died at a flooded nursing home in Chalmette when the staff left the elderly residents behind in their beds. And Rep. Charlie Melancon said more than 100 people died at a dockside warehouse while they waited for rescuers to ferry them to safety.

From the article "Some New Orleans Holdouts Leave Reluctantly," By SHARON COHEN, AP, NEW ORLEANS (Sept. 7)  as seen at http://aolsvc.news.aol.com/news/article.adp?id=20050824033709990005

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      The employees who deserted those elderly patients should be brought up on criminal charges by the Federal government AND State government!   How dare they leave human beings to drown, especially when nursing home patients are often immobile or need assistance to get to a sitting position.  They could have placed each patient in a Geri-chair and wheeled them to a central place where they might be safer -- or someplace where their heads might have been higher than the water level !  To be stranded in hospital beds, and often restrained as many nursing home patients are kept on a daily basis, and left to drown is a criminal act of homocide. 

       What are the identites of those employees?  Where did they go?  Who rescued them?  AND what employees, if any, told any person in authority that the patients were there?  OR, did they all act cowardly, run away from their responsibility and never mention the patients to anyone?? 

        Where is the television coverage on this story?  Where is CNN - why hasn't a journalist tracked down those employees to whatever shelter they are in and asked them "WHY did you kill those people?"  The easy answer is "I didn't kill them; the floodwaters killed them."  But, the moral responsibility of caregivers is the same, whether in the face of any conditions at that institution.  Every institution has evacuation plans for fire, flood, etc.  Yes, the New Orleans flood was not within the "normal" scope of disasters, but thoseemployees did not even try to rescue those patients!

          Through the New Orleans tragedy, we have witnessed a large number of examples of the moral decline of America.  Snipers shooting at rescuers and those trying to make repairs to pumping, cell towers, electrical grid; rapes and murders at the Dome; leaving the invalid strapped to hospital beds....  All I can say is, God help us all.